"H,ONE,J,K,L,M,N,ZEROOO"
Whoever invented numbers and the alphabet is fucking retarded. It makes me wonder if one guy did it or if there was a group of people deciding on it. It's a little more reasonable if it was just one guy, and everyone was like, "Hey, make us some shapes that look like the sounds we're making when we're talking, so we can use those shapes to draw and give to people so we never have to talk to them!" so the guy would just be like, "Okay fine... here's 26 shapes for sounds and 10 shapes for counting shit. I didn't look over it." and then that's how the alphabet was born and everybody in the history of the world was too lazy to change O's and zero's or 1's and I's and lower case l's so they didn't look exactly the same. Is it really that fucking hard? Could you really not think of any other shapes to use, like a square or a triangle?
The second most reasonable option would be if it was a group of people and they were just high as fuck and were like, "Dude. What if we made shapes for noises. And we called it the alphabet. Cue. Cuuuuuuuee. Cuuuuuuuuuuuue. Dude, it sounds like a circle with a line through the bottom right corner" and they were so high that they forgot that they already used a plain circle twice and a straight line three times.
The third option that is more retarded than John Travolta's son is that a group of sober people decided upon it. Like if they finally had all the shapes written down and were like, "Nope. I see nothing wrong with the alphabet and numbers at all. There would be nothing confusing at all if I was three years old trying to learn the alphabet and numbers and I had to know the difference between I, 1, and lowercase l, and if people called me an idiot for singing the alphabet by saying 'JKLMNZEROOOO.'"
In protest to the alphabet and numbers, I will request a vanity plate consisting of all zeros and O's, and then do the most illegal shit possible in my car. Nobody would be able to report my license plate because they wouldn't be able to tell the difference.
"911"
"Hey this guy was just doing donuts in front of the White House, bumping Bone Thugz-n-Harmony and shooting a rocket launcher out of his sunroof."
"Okay, can I get his license plate?"
"Umm, okay. Zero, Zero, O, Zero. No wait, I think that's an O. No, it's skinnier than the other circles...fuck... I can't tell! Who the fuck invented the alphabet?"
Hopefully you all will join me and get your own license plate made of all zero's and O's and we can start a gang called the circle gang.
